Little Smirks - think of a question - pick a card

These cards were written as a fun guide for the most awkward questions in your life.
Simply think of the question and then click the little smirks button for an instant wise answer that may make you smirk!
Presidents, Prime Ministers and other assorted dignitaries are welcome to use them to help them make decisions of cosmic importance.

Zen master pieces about nothing

A monk was walking on a dark road. His friend said “Can you see?”
The monk replied: “Don’t call me C”.

Before enlightenment I was on the road to truth.
After enlightenment I realised that there was no road to truth and no such thing as enlightenment.

One monk said to another monk: “Watch how the birds fly from branch to branch ever singing and praising the gods.”
The other monk replied: “You’re so stupid. I think I need a real job”.

One monk said to another monk: “Where is the way of truth?”
“There is no way and no truth, so shut up and eat your rice, at least we don’t have to work for a living”.

The quieter you become, the duller your brain. Meditate on this and you will fall asleep.

Meditation is like chasing your shadow. Even if you catch it, it has no lasting value.

Zen is neZ spelt backwards. ‘Nez’ is French for ‘nose’. So what? - famous zen statement for people who find meanings in anything.

What is the sound of one monk clapping?
A poorly attended zen concert.

Zen statements must be whispered and felt with an awe that only those who worship nothing can feel. Move slowly when you are in the presence of zen or you may snap out of your delusion and walk smack into reality.

31 things in life that seem definite to me

1. Physical laws of the universe are consistent only on the human scale of things.

2. Nature does not express compassion or favouritism.

3. Every living thing has to work to survive the constant onslaught of nature.

4. Everything is born to die.

5. The physical world is infinite - it cannot be measured.

6. Nature is cyclic.

7. There are other realities - dreams, visions experiences beyond the physical - these are not measurable or consistent or even interpretable.

8. There are other senses beyond mine.

9. The interpretation of situations depends on me and my attitude.

10. The clarity of my mind depends on the health of my body.

11. I have little control over the varying circumstances of my life.

12. My beliefs vary with circumstances.

13. My senses create reality.

14. I am trapped within my own personality.

15. Humans need personality validation - I must be heard or seen etc.

16. Change is consistent, natural and unpredictable.

17. Inconsistency is necessary for survival - e.g. you cannot be honest or dishonest all of the time.

18. The laws of society are not moral, they are rules. I must live within these rules or risk my freedom.

19. Whenever humans form groups, they form unjust hierarchies.

20. Society is intolerant to non-conformist behaviour.

21. Governments put money before people.

22. Money gives flexibility and choice.

23. Beauty is attractive to humans.

24. Confinement is repulsive to humans.

25. There is no proof of the past. All I have for certain is what is here now.

26. Memory is unreliable.

27. The future only exists in the imagination.

28. Time is inconsistent.

29. My way of viewing the world is unique.

30. You will die.

31. Rules are not reliable.

There are thousands of things we have learnt about life,
but very little we know about it!